Post by Gardenia on Feb 9, 2013 0:11:41 GMT -5
((very personal, long, and written out of bitterness i'm sorry don't kill me))
steamcommunity.com/id/stilldefective
THIS GUY
steamcommunity.com/id/zardica
AND THIS GUY
first guy's name is Paul, he's 14, and I know him irl. he goes to my school and I have a few classes with him and sit with him at lunch. the second one's a fatassed furry who claims to be 17 and is very very freaking sexual, creepy, and weird.
during the past school year i decided to step out of my comfort zone a bit and I ended up being good friends with paul. we found we had a bunch in common and started talking to each other more and more and after a long while we started going steady. This was all back in August/September.
in the beginning, that goddamned furry zardica caused us some problems. apparently since before paul and i even met he and zardica had been yiffing together over steam chat. which if you didnt know is basically roleplaying furry sex. i found out and i was kinda upset, but paul promised to stop and i didn't hear of it happening again (though really i don't know if they kept doing it).
forward to late january. paul and i were actually both doing really well and i was always in a good mood and all his friends were all essentially my friends because i spent a lot of time around them. it was really great and paul was always really nice to me and just dsghlkf thinking back to that makes me want to cry
because then suddenly one day paul told me that he didnt feel right and he wanted to be left alone for a while. i toned it down for about two weeks because i was worried about him and wanted him to feel better. eventually i took him aside to ask him what was bothering him and he said he thought he might be depressed. he said he didn't feel like being around people. but there was something weird about it, because he was only like that around me. around his friends he was his normal energetic, happy, and adorable self. so then after another long wait i asked him if he was really sad in general or if it was just me. he told me that he doesn't feel the same about me. later he texted me that he thinks he's gay. and he just avoided me at school. if i started a conversation he'd comply, but he never went out of his way to say hi. i really really wanted to help him feel better but whenever i talked to him he looked miserable and it just drove me crazy. then one day he broke up with me over the internet and dropped all that "it's not you, it's me" shit. he kept insisting that suddenly one day he woke up and didn't feel the same anymore. it was really weird so i was a little suspicious but i didn't really dig deeper into it. i kept sitting by him at lunch and everything because i didn't really know what to do. we both treated each other as (pretty awkward) friends i guess.
but the day after he'd broken up with me i saw that he was texting under the table at lunch. which was weird, because he NEVER texted at school. even when i'd texted him during class. absolutely never. so i leaned over and looked at his phone, expecting to be able to joke to him about his mom forgetting that he was in school and couldn't reply again or something like that. except i see him texting "Jason" (Zardica's real name,), and Jason'd said "<3 (some shit) *blushes*". paul didn't notice that i'd been an asshole and read over his shoulder so i casually asked him who he was texting.
"oh, my mom."
i told him i'd seen who he was texting, he blushed and he started apologizing fucking over and over and so a whole wave of realization crashed down about why he was acting so damn weird. "jasons not the reason i left you really i was going to anyway and he said he liked me and we aren't dating or anything and..." good lord. nobody else at the table seemed to hear because we're americans and the lunch room is fucking loud.
it was a tuesday, so after school i went to newspaper club. paul usually goes, but he skipped out on it after what had happened at lunch. two of mine paul's friends, alec and cailen, were also there. it'd been a really shitty day and i didn't know what to do and had to get it off my chest so i told them about what'd been happening between paul and zardica/jason. they both knew zardica too, so i figured it wouldn't really turn out to be a big deal with them. with cailen it was all cool because really he's just cool and quiet about everything. but alec got really riled up about it. he told everyone in their "steam clique" and was yelling at paul for dating (apparently it was official and paul had lied about it) over the internet and tons of shit. i talked with alec and calmed him down over steam. i told him that paul doesn't need his friends yelling at him and really just needs to be supported throughout the relationship blah blah blah a ton of bullshit i pulled out of my ass so that alec would be a good friend to paul. because, i mean, he's probably kinda confused etc. etc. etc..
paul's still mad at me. it's only been a week, so i guess i shouldn't expect him to talk to me yet?? i don't know. but i do know that paul and zardica are getting pretty close. i don't know what kind of stuff they're talking about but i know they're spending a lot of time talking. they're both (i don't like this phrase but) hardcore gamers. paul's usually almost always playing something when he logs onto steam, and he doesn't use steam mobile very often. zardica's an absolute maniac with a steam rating of 10 all the damn time because he's never not playing a fucking game. except lately, they're both hardly ever playing games. paul is on steam mobile half the time. zardica's always online but doesn't play games while paul's online. and wow ahaha i feel like i'm going to cry whenever i see paul online now because i know exactly what he's doing and i hate it it makes me want to punch a hole in the damn furry's face but i don't want to because paul seems genuinely happier lately but he's so bitter towards me and i miss him because i feel like i've lost my best friend and i don't know what to do irl anymore because hang out with him was pretty much all i did the entire school year
sorry thanks for skimming
steamcommunity.com/id/stilldefective
THIS GUY
steamcommunity.com/id/zardica
AND THIS GUY
first guy's name is Paul, he's 14, and I know him irl. he goes to my school and I have a few classes with him and sit with him at lunch. the second one's a fatassed furry who claims to be 17 and is very very freaking sexual, creepy, and weird.
during the past school year i decided to step out of my comfort zone a bit and I ended up being good friends with paul. we found we had a bunch in common and started talking to each other more and more and after a long while we started going steady. This was all back in August/September.
in the beginning, that goddamned furry zardica caused us some problems. apparently since before paul and i even met he and zardica had been yiffing together over steam chat. which if you didnt know is basically roleplaying furry sex. i found out and i was kinda upset, but paul promised to stop and i didn't hear of it happening again (though really i don't know if they kept doing it).
forward to late january. paul and i were actually both doing really well and i was always in a good mood and all his friends were all essentially my friends because i spent a lot of time around them. it was really great and paul was always really nice to me and just dsghlkf thinking back to that makes me want to cry
because then suddenly one day paul told me that he didnt feel right and he wanted to be left alone for a while. i toned it down for about two weeks because i was worried about him and wanted him to feel better. eventually i took him aside to ask him what was bothering him and he said he thought he might be depressed. he said he didn't feel like being around people. but there was something weird about it, because he was only like that around me. around his friends he was his normal energetic, happy, and adorable self. so then after another long wait i asked him if he was really sad in general or if it was just me. he told me that he doesn't feel the same about me. later he texted me that he thinks he's gay. and he just avoided me at school. if i started a conversation he'd comply, but he never went out of his way to say hi. i really really wanted to help him feel better but whenever i talked to him he looked miserable and it just drove me crazy. then one day he broke up with me over the internet and dropped all that "it's not you, it's me" shit. he kept insisting that suddenly one day he woke up and didn't feel the same anymore. it was really weird so i was a little suspicious but i didn't really dig deeper into it. i kept sitting by him at lunch and everything because i didn't really know what to do. we both treated each other as (pretty awkward) friends i guess.
but the day after he'd broken up with me i saw that he was texting under the table at lunch. which was weird, because he NEVER texted at school. even when i'd texted him during class. absolutely never. so i leaned over and looked at his phone, expecting to be able to joke to him about his mom forgetting that he was in school and couldn't reply again or something like that. except i see him texting "Jason" (Zardica's real name,), and Jason'd said "<3 (some shit) *blushes*". paul didn't notice that i'd been an asshole and read over his shoulder so i casually asked him who he was texting.
"oh, my mom."
i told him i'd seen who he was texting, he blushed and he started apologizing fucking over and over and so a whole wave of realization crashed down about why he was acting so damn weird. "jasons not the reason i left you really i was going to anyway and he said he liked me and we aren't dating or anything and..." good lord. nobody else at the table seemed to hear because we're americans and the lunch room is fucking loud.
it was a tuesday, so after school i went to newspaper club. paul usually goes, but he skipped out on it after what had happened at lunch. two of mine paul's friends, alec and cailen, were also there. it'd been a really shitty day and i didn't know what to do and had to get it off my chest so i told them about what'd been happening between paul and zardica/jason. they both knew zardica too, so i figured it wouldn't really turn out to be a big deal with them. with cailen it was all cool because really he's just cool and quiet about everything. but alec got really riled up about it. he told everyone in their "steam clique" and was yelling at paul for dating (apparently it was official and paul had lied about it) over the internet and tons of shit. i talked with alec and calmed him down over steam. i told him that paul doesn't need his friends yelling at him and really just needs to be supported throughout the relationship blah blah blah a ton of bullshit i pulled out of my ass so that alec would be a good friend to paul. because, i mean, he's probably kinda confused etc. etc. etc..
paul's still mad at me. it's only been a week, so i guess i shouldn't expect him to talk to me yet?? i don't know. but i do know that paul and zardica are getting pretty close. i don't know what kind of stuff they're talking about but i know they're spending a lot of time talking. they're both (i don't like this phrase but) hardcore gamers. paul's usually almost always playing something when he logs onto steam, and he doesn't use steam mobile very often. zardica's an absolute maniac with a steam rating of 10 all the damn time because he's never not playing a fucking game. except lately, they're both hardly ever playing games. paul is on steam mobile half the time. zardica's always online but doesn't play games while paul's online. and wow ahaha i feel like i'm going to cry whenever i see paul online now because i know exactly what he's doing and i hate it it makes me want to punch a hole in the damn furry's face but i don't want to because paul seems genuinely happier lately but he's so bitter towards me and i miss him because i feel like i've lost my best friend and i don't know what to do irl anymore because hang out with him was pretty much all i did the entire school year
sorry thanks for skimming